The Importance of Being Civil

There was an interesting talk about civility yesterday on KQED’s Forum, with Michael Krasny. The talk was sparked by a recent outbreak of un-civility at a San Francisco Board of Supervisors meeting where “Supervisor Chris Daly angrily suggested Mayor Gavin Newsom uses cocaine and is hypocritically slashing funding for substance abuse treatment for poor people.”

There was a couple of really great points made by the guests:

• That often the style of discourse upstages the issue. It was Chris Daly’s behavior that was reported on, not the issue of cuts in public health funding.

• That civility is crucial for democracy, both at the interpersonal level and institutionally. It better enables discourse, interpersonal connection, and the free exchange of ideas so important to a democratic society.

• That the mainstream media encourages un-civility by rewarding personalities who get ratings through personal attacks and mean-spirited discourse. Guests mentioned Ann Coulter and Rush Limbaugh as examples of those that have become financially rich at the expense of public civility.

• That there should be some standards in public life, but that they should not be imposed by the government, rather they should be created, agreed upon, and supported by those hosting and participating in forums.

All good points. I’ve often thought civility is the cement that holds civilization together. If it’s washed away, then the whole structure crumbles.

At Abundance League meetings we support civility by encouraging people to form relationships around and talk about substantive life projects, especially those that are core to a person’s being, i.e. their passion or calling. And by encouraging social accessibility and self-defined identity.

I think the main thing I want to say with this post is that each of us is responsible for the creation and protection of a civil atmosphere and that our daily actions and words count in making that happen. There’s a lot each of us can do in our everyday life to open up the channels between our friends, family, neighbors, or anyone we might meet in this great world. Each of us can make sure these channels are filled with talk and ideas that make us happy and vibrant.

I, for one, am not going to let Rush Limbaugh or Ann Coulter shape the social environment I live in. I take responsibility for shaping it, and with help from friends and family, there is much we can do each day to create a vibrant and abundant social atmosphere. This includes, among many other things, tuning out the deadening drum beat of demogogues and tuning into the enlivening song of dreams and ideas shared amongst friends, family, and fellow citizens.